Please Hack the NFL Draft

These dinosaurs have no flipping idea how to use technology. I have no doubt in my mind that this draft is going to be like watching a car crash with all the technical difficulties that will arise from doing it completely remotely. I'm not okay with just the minor speed bump here or there though, I want absolute chaos. If I had the skillset, I would be hacking into the NFL draft like nobodies business, locking teams out of their own computers, trading first round picks for seventh round picks, and picking names from the Key and Peele East West College Bowl skit instead of actual prospects in this draft. Unfortunately for us and fortunately for that bastard Goodell, I can't hack for shit so I'm no threat. Someone out there reading this right now though, I know you can hack, I know your a hacker and I know you can do this for me. I'm not asking for the world here, all I want is for you to hack into the NFL draft and make sure all 32 first round picks are kickers and punters. The world needs a laugh now more than ever, so please sabotage the biggest sports league in the world;s draft night so we at home can collectively laugh at the chaos. We are counting on you mystery hacker, do not let us down.


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